With the new football season underway...

...and Newcastle United no closer to escaping their laughing stock status, it's high time to revisit one of last season's finest football rants. Joe Kinnear, a man addicted to heart attacks and not afraid, in the presence of children, to brand short-lived female Premier League assistant referee Wendy Toms "a fucking slag, a cunt" to her face, lets rip.

"Which one of you is Simon Bird?"
"Me."
"You're a cunt."


Listen again to the infamous press conference here, and if that doesn't do it for you, here is the same dialogue as read by a computer. It's a stone fact that Radiohead's 'OK Computer' becomes at least twice the album if this is inserted in place of 'Fitter Happier'.

And don't forget - Dennis Wise was never in the Crazy Gang. AC